I made it another year!!!

Coach K
5 days ago
3 min read

Hey y’all hey,

October 11th has come and gone again.

Not only did I go outside — I went to a room that was crafted just for me to change this milestone moment from one of loss to one of introductions.

Like to hear it, Here we go…..

We are in the beginning of our holiday season, and I’m already hearing conversations around navigating Thanksgiving, considering Christmas, and the loved one who will be missing.

I’m also hearing how people are responding to others’ losses — sometimes in dismissive or inconsiderate exchanges.

This season marks the beginning of my own grief journey.

On October 11, 2021, my husband transitioned unexpectedly.

This month has been quiet and busy all at the same time. I’ve been very sensitive to my own volume — to how I’m processing grief and loss this month.

I Went Outside

Typically, I’m stationary — giving myself room to go left, right, up, or down.

But this year was different. I was out. I was engaged. I was in my element.

I was in a space that gave me permission to transition into the next best version of me. #MindYourMind with Dr Kem McKenzie

That’s why this year’s Growing Through Grief: Holiday Edition is really special — it’s really important.

Not only do I understand the support we need around grief during the holidays —

I understand that our community at large needs information on how to support those of us who are grieving during the holidays.

We often expect people to be better when they haven’t been honest enough about being in that position themselves.

So instead of us being frustrated, irritated, or disappointed — let’s increase awareness. Let’s give information.

Grief Is A Journey

If you are the person who needs support during the holidays — join the journey.

If you are the person who has a family member who has lost someone — join the journey, too.

You are grieving alongside those who grieve.

Do we understand that as a community — when we grieve, we grieve.

You may be grieving from one stance, but it’s no less grief.

How you process it and journey through it is unique to you — but the fact that we are going through it remains the same.

So this is me — processing my own journey, while inviting you to journey together.

Shout out to Coach Q (Qwanquita Wright) of Focusing on SELF and Dr. Crystal Lou of EQ with Lou.

I’m so grateful for them and their yes this season.

5 Ways to Support Someone Grieving During the Holidays

Because love is louder than loss and the loss is only big because the love was bigger!

1. Don’t dismiss their loss with clichés.

Avoid saying things like “They’re in a better place” or “You should be over it by now.” Those phrases might sound comforting, but they minimize real pain. Let people feel what they feel — grief has no timeline.

2. Listen to hear, not to solve.

We don’t need you to fix anything — everything already feels broken. What helps most is presence, not answers. Let your listening be the ministry.

3. If it’s on your heart to do it, just do it.

Asking “What can I do for you?” can feel overwhelming. If you feel led to cook, send a text, or drop off a gift — just do it. Follow your spirit. The thought and action speak louder than any question.

4. Send them things that will make them smile.

Small gestures matter. A favorite snack, a candle, a song, or a quote — they remind us that someone knows what we love while we’re remembering who we lost. Those moments of joy help us breathe again.

5. Speak life — your words matter.

Send loving, encouraging messages that acknowledge where we are. They don’t require a response; they just remind us we’re seen, supported, and loved. Sometimes the right words are the very thing that help us keep going.

💚🌺 Grief doesn’t always need answers — it needs awareness, presence, and love.

So if you’re the one grieving, give yourself permission to be human.

And if you’re walking with someone who’s grieving, give them grace.

Either way, we’re all just learning to grow through what we’ve gone through.